Expectations serve as Limitations

Expectations surround us. We are expected to be good students, mothers, workers...and the list goes on. We are expected to talk, dress, act, and present ourselves in certain manners. Are our lives dictated by expectations? What purpose do these expectations serve... and are they not limitations? The minute something is expected of us is the moment we limit ourselves to that singular destiny. I wonder how much of my life has been dictated by these very expectations. Would I have gone to college if I was not expected to? Would I dress the way I do if I was not expected to? Would I be a Hindu? Would I make my bed if I was not expected to? People say humans have free will. They say 'free will' is one of the defining factors that separate humans from the rest of the animal kingdom. But do we really make our own choices? How many of the choices that I have made in my own life are truly my own, totally uninfluenced by those that surround me? Perhaps this a moot point, since humans are social creatures and we are bound to be influenced by the society we live in. But I feel somewhere we have gone wrong. I mean how many of these expectations really serve a valid purpose, and if so what are they?

For example, many of my friend's families have begun to pressure their children to get married. Why? Well it can be argued that the society they live in expects them(the children) to be married by a certain age. Also maybe the function of an early marriage is to assure children are born relatively quickly thereby reducing the risk of children born with mental and physical problems. This is all well and good, but it is not really necessary. Children can be born out of wedlock. People can engage in happy and healthy relationships without ever being married. The expectation of marriage serves a meaningless purpose. The expectation of marriage by a certain age puts a limitation on one's ability to choose a partner of choice. The minute you a put a time frame on something the pressure is on, and everyone knows that things done under pressure don't always work out the best.

Whether it is marriage, the clothes we wear, the friends we keep company with... expectations are always there. I do not know how to break free from them, or if it is even a possibility. But I am trying to be more aware of my choices. I ask myself questions like, 'Is this what you really want?' and 'Is this going to make you happy'. I am trying to explore myself, and understand myself so that I can make more informed choices. Maybe it is easier to succumb to what is expected of you when you don't know what to expect of yourself?

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