Indian American Love Child

The Miami countdown begins. t-1month. It is strange to think that in 1 month i will be in a foreign city on my own. This will be my first time away from my friends, my family, and my sister for an extended period of time. I mean I dormed for one year during college, but that doesn't really count considering i lived in Newark and was able to come home pretty much whenever. I am not really looking forward to moving away too much. People think I am strange. What you don't want to move out of the house already? Aren't you ready to get away they ask. And honestly my answer is No. To me, home is my sanctuary . When i have a rough day, or things just aren't going well... home is where i find peace. It is the once place that I know I am loved unconditionally. There are no pretenses, no reservations, just unadulterated love and support. I will miss that comfort the most. Sure some days i need a break, or i say i can't wait to leave. But I don't really mean it, Home ...

Spring showers bring may flowers. But may is over, and I don't care for the flowers anymore! I just want some fun in the sun! Long days at the beach, nights filled with laughter, summer drinks, bbqs, day trips to the city...i crave the simple pleasures that come along with long, hot days! But no instead i get rain, more rain, with a chance of rain! It is like it never ends!!! There hasn't been a weekend rain free for awhile now! But i guess i shouldn't complain all that much. My weekends have been spent quite pleasurably nonetheless. I have been catching up with friends. Friday night I went out with parul, and eneded up having a really nice night. We met 'Mr. Walmart' as I shall call him, and it was entertaining to say the least. Later that night we ran into shree after what seemed to be ages! Then saturday i went on this ridiculous search with my parents and yera... haha it was hilarous. We ended up touring jersey. Later I hung out with alex, maria, and shelley... ...

I have been having this strange feeling lately. I just want to pick up and leave and start anew. I want to go to place where nobody knows me, and I know no one. Where I have no past. I feel like my emotions are all askew. A roller coaster ride ride of pleasure and pain. I love my life here in Jersey... I do. I love my family and friends, but I need a change, a break. Moreover, I am so confused... so very confused. My love life is in shambles. There is a man that I should be with, we go so well together but i can not bring myself to see him that way. There is a man who likes me, and i like him to on some level but it is just not possible. And there is a man who I like, but does not like me. wtf. I Just want to leave these reminders of should have, could have, can't have. That's why august, I have begun to feel, could not come soon enough.

Hero. Not a film star hero. Not a superhero. Not a public figure hero. Not an everyday hero. My heroes fit a very different description.... I interned at a mental health facility two summers. My internship was one of the most humbling and life changing experiences of my life. I worked along side social workers, psychiatric nurses, clinical psychologists, and psychiatrists. Together we helped create a nurturing environment of growth, stability, and safety. My role was small, but the staff made me feel welcome and kept me involved in the clinical processes. The facility was an out patient day time facility for patients suffering from mental illness. Many of the patients also suffered from other mental disabilities such as mild to severe mental retardation. These patients were discharged form the hospital but still needed on going care. So they would come to this facility from 9-4 and get counseling, medications, and treatment. Many of the patients live in group homes for the mentally i...

I was going to write about something else today, but then decided I just wasn't in the mood. What am I in the mood for.... is some pumpkin pie. You heard me! Some melt in your mouth, spicy sweet, remind you of the perfect autumn- pumpkin pie. The craving just came over me about an hour ago. Man I can act like such a pregnant woman sometimes. Anyways neither do I know where to find pumpkin pie, and neither do I need any pumpkin pie. But i thought i might as well blog about my frustrations. Speaking of which- I have been quite frustrated recently. I have been trying to square away things for august, and things are just not going well. Deferring my loans, applying for new loans, securing an apartment, finding a roommate, figuring how I am getting down there... everything is just plain annoying. Never do I get a straightforward answer, people are unreliable, and instructions are unclear. It is a pain in the butt! Oh and to make matters worse... I got my first semester books and the mat...

Sign me up! It's only two thirty in the morning, and my eyes just won't shut. I am so frustrated this is the third night in a row! Its not that I am not sleepy, its that my body just won't let me sleep. I don't understand why... nothing is troubling me, I am not stressed, room is comfortable, I am a little hungry, but besides that all is good! Why oh why am I being deprived of some quality zzzzz's ? Frustrated, upset, and sleepy Nandita